Colony Collapse

Journal Entry, April 7, 1861:

Colony collapse has finally hit the hive.

It appears that Fort Sumter is the final fuse;

I can hear the explosions before they even begin.

Am I among the many

that ask themselves;

is this all I have learned;

birth and death, and birth and death,

and birth.

Is this it;

all I could learn.

Born again and born again;

I long to be born anew;

to stop repeating the same words,

the same ideas,

the same thoughts.

Every five seconds; a thought, a rememberance,

an idea; perhaps that sounds impressive,

but it is only a chattering

in my mind,

in my sleep,

in my waking;

every five seconds.

A new idea; no.

A new thought; no.

The same thoughts, the same ideas,

the same learning that did not work yesterday.

Seventeen thousand thoughts a day.

Is this all I have learned;

is this all we have learned.

Another war; another one

to blame, to hate.

Will we ever be born anew?